Marriage Moments
No Record of Wrongs
To set up this story, my husband’s driving tends to make me crazy, even his parking.
One morning, on our way to church no less, we stopped at the grocery store for a coffee. I was already stirred up due to his driving habits to get there. He parked, got out and walked into the store. I, of course, noted his crazy crooked parking. Not all the way into the space, across the lines and sticking out into the drive way.
Side note, there was almost no one in the parking lot and it did not impact anyone but me. I promptly pulled my phone out and prepared to take pictures for evidence of his "poor driving and parking habits". I am thinking, I could show him his error, or show people to get sympathy and ammunition to use against him.
But God, quickly put the kabosh on my plans. The Holy Spirit dropped a reminder into me, “Love does not keep records of wrongs”.
1 Corinthians 13:4-7, well known love passages, starting at verse 5 "it (love) does not dishonor, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs…”
I was preparing to keep a lot of records of his wrongs. Wow, where was my heart? Would I be showing God’s love? Not just no, but .... NO!! I put my phone back into my purse.
His driving and parking referred to in this story was not unsafe. It was that he does not do it the way I would, his motivations for how he drives are different than mine, as a man and a woman we think differently. Me being irritated is ultimately my issue. I was judging him not loving him.
The Rest of the Story – No Record of Wrongs
Recently, our family had gotten together for the day. My daughter-in-love talked about how, at work if a co-worker found your phone they would take some crazy picture with it, unknown to you until a later time. Very fun…
So a couple days later my husband and I were at certain Home improvement store. He had left his phone in the truck. I offered to return to the truck and retrieve the phone.
When I had the phone in my hand, I noticed the semi crazy way he parked and was reminded of the story I had heard a few days earlier. I took the picture with his phone and returned the phone to my husband.
It did not take long that he found the picture. I was just trying to be funny, but boy, it really back fired. For the next week my husband took a picture every time he parked, crazy or not and text it to me. Eventually, pics of other crazier parkers showed up as well.
I had to raise the white flag and apologize for my actions. I could not be mad, he is not the only wild parker. Lol…. More proof he is normal, he says.
Moral of the story, keep no records of wrongs and keep your phone in a safe place, like your pocket.
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Marriage Moment Archives
It is All His Fault
My marriage moment starts with a little background:
My husband and I were at our boat in a marina behind a locked gate. We are at the end of the dock which is about 100 yards from the gate.
One rainy night it was about 8pm and I had decided to go up to the showers. The showers are on another extension of the marina. I asked my husband if he wanted to come with me. He had already showered, so "no". So I proceeded down the dock to the gate with towel and shower bag in hand.
I was on the outside of the gate when I realized that I did not have my gate key to get back in. So here I am, on the outside of the gate, stuck. It was late and no one else was around to help me. I decided to continue on my trek to shower, knowing that gate was not working earlier in the day. I was able to complete my task and then returned to our locked gate.
At that point I knew my husband would be asleep on the couch inside and would not hear if I called out. He would also not notice I was missing. So I proceeded to wind myself up and blame my husband for my situation. I was good at getting all upset when I would dwell on junk.
It had rained earlier in the evening and so what would I do if it would start to rain again? Go back to the showers and sleep there?
Across the walk way is a rental pontoon boat, there I could at least sit.
Next, there are the raccoons who roam freely after dusk. I was sure they would arrive on the docks soon. Sure enough, I watched him approach the locked gate and crawl over the edge and under the dock. "that's how they are getting past the gates..." Continuing my rant, I was afraid to fall asleep on this boat that the raccoon would visit and lick my ear or something...
Of course it is all because my husband doesn't care enough to realize I'm even missing. His sleep is so important that I could get eaten by the wildlife and he would not care. I was there what seemed like hours.
Finally, I decided not to continue to waste valuable time that I could spend in prayer and talking to God. I am a Christian after all.
As soon as I stopped with the crazy rant, I looked at the gate and right there was a row boat on the outside of the gate, next to the open available dock behind the gate. Recognizing this answer, I placed my bag just outside the gate, crawled into the row boat, half full of rain water mind you, almost falling into the lake, then climbing out the other side onto the dock, push the button and pick up my shower bag and returned to our boat.
That row boat did not just appear out of nowhere, it was there the whole time. I had put myself into such a tizzy and blaming my husband for my errors and circumstance it had blinded me to the answer to my situation.
When I decided to stop my foolishness, God was able to show me my salvation. It was my foolishness that kept me out of a warm, dry, comfortable home, free of wild animals who might lick my ears as I slept.
Blaming my husband accomplished nothing but add to the chaos in my mind and clouded my vision to see my answer.
"Seek first the His kingdom and His righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well." (Matthew 6:33 NIV)
God always has the answer to our situations. The answer may not be easy and we may have to get a little wet, but the result is always best. We must be still and our heart open that we will recognize the answer when it comes.
-Julie
